Forever Rowan Read online

  “Look at me, Rowan,” he commanded through clenched teeth. Her lids rose and she looked him in the eye. He took one hand out of her hair and placed it on her cheek, the gesture more gentle then he had ever given a lover.

  “Watch me when you make me come, Rowan. I want to see your face when I spill into your mouth.” Her eyes darkened and she pulled harder, sucking his soul through his cock. He threw his head back as he felt the build up from his tight balls. Snapping his gaze back to her, Aidan watched her face, her expression so open as tears formed in her eyes. His thumbs caught the drops as they fell.

  “Rowan! Oh, fuck, Rowan! Take it baby, swallow all of me,” he bellowed as he let his seed pour into her mouth. She took it all, every drop, sucking until he was jerking from the tenderness his cock enjoyed.

  He fell to his knees and roughly grabbed her upper arms. The moment she’d taken his seed into her, something else had left his body along with it. The fury that had kept him going since the moment his sister was kidnapped disappeared. The hatred that burned his soul evaporated, in its place was hope and need and desire.

  “What the fuck have you done to me?” he groaned, shaking her shoulders. “I want it back, Rowan. Give it back.”

  Her stunned expression met his. He knew she had no idea what had just taken place.

  “I’m sorry, Aidan. What did I do wrong? Did I hurt you?” Her tears now fell in full force down her cheeks.

  “My hate, my anger, my goddamn soul. I want them back.” His voice cracked as he leaned his forehead against hers. Shaking uncontrollably, his grip loosened and his hands softened on her shoulders.

  “Aidan, I don’t understand.” Her breath washed warm and damp over his lips. How could he explain it to her, make her understand? He could blame it on the bonding, but he knew damn well the stripping of his anger, his pain, had nothing to do with that.

  Her hands rubbed along his forearms. “Aidan, I’m sorry, for whatever has happened, I am so sorry.”

  “I won’t love you, Rowan. I won’t ever love you.” He wasn’t ready to care for his mate like that. He had to fight the love threatening to overwhelm him. Fuck! Everything he knew, everything he’d ever thought, was being destroyed and he didn’t know how to begin to understand it. He pushed her to the floor, his thighs parting hers. He kissed her, his mouth desperate against hers. She gave as good as she got. This coupling would not be a gentle joining of bodies. He was fighting the demon inside of him, and needed to purge himself. He felt safe within her embrace, safe enough to let go of all the bullshit and expose his fear and his need. Only through her could Aidan excise the ghost haunting him.

  His tongue thrust deep into her mouth, swiping at hers. He bit it hard before smoothing it over and sucking it gently. He was greedy to taste all of her. His lips lowered to her neck and shoulders, while busy fingers marched their way down her skin. Cupping one of her breasts, he circled his fingers around the nipple until it was taut and she cried out for more.

  “My mouth, that’s what you want on your nipples, Rowan?” His lungs needed some serious air but he couldn’t think about that now. No, all he wanted was to taste her further.

  He wrapped his lips around one pink tip, then the other, insatiable as he kissed and suckled them deeply. Flicking his tongue over them until Rowan’s hips came up off the floor in silent invitation, he wallowed in the scent of her, the taste, and the feel.

  “That’s right, Luv, you like the way I touch you,” he cooed. There was no question in his voice this time. She was assaulting his every sense, leaving only an aching need in her wake.

  His right hand slid down between her thighs; she was soaking wet. He groaned as he gathered some of her cream, then raised his finger to his mouth and tasted her sweetness. She gasped at the action, eyes glazing in helpless hunger.

  When his finger grazed the tip of her clit, she clamped her thighs shut.

  “Oh, no you don’t.” Aidan laughed as he pried her legs open again. “It’s your turn to feel out of control. I’m going to make you come so hard for me, baby.”

  Sliding two fingers into her channel, he hissed at the silky, wet heat. She held him tight when he began to move, coating his fingers with her juices. His thumb stroked over her clit as he thrust faster.

  *

  “Open your legs wide for me, Rowan, and I’ll make you come so hard you’ll think you’ve died.” It was like he was intent on branding her body as his. Didn’t he realize it already was? She’d never felt like this before. Had never imagined she could feel like this.

  He plunged his fingers back into her hungry sheath, coating himself with her arousal before pulling out. His thumb still caressing her clit, he slid his slick finger to her ass. Tracing his way down to her secret entrance, he wiggled his finger into her virgin hole. She stiffened at the foreign feeling.

  “Relax into it, baby. Don’t fight it. I will have all of you.”

  He bent low and let his tongue slash across her clit, sucking it in his mouth as he moved his free hand to her opening. She moved her hips to meet his mouth, biting her lip to keep from crying out.

  The finger on her ass moved in circles as he plunged into her hot pussy. She moaned when he nipped her clit, then sucked it deeply.

  “Play with you nipples, Rowan. Show me how you like it,” he rasped against her sensitive flesh. She rolled the twin peaks with her fingers, pinching and pulling them. At first she was shy, lying there making her nipples turn a deep red from her rough play, but soon sensation won out over self-consciousness. Aidan’s eyes widened at the sight, and he sucked her clit in time to the pulls she made on her nipples.

  “Oh God, yes, Aidan. I’m going to come.” He didn’t stop his assault; he plunged harder, sucked deeper until her small cries turned into wild moans and she exploded in his hands and on his tongue.

  In the next breath, he moved both legs between her thighs, placing the tip of his hard cock at her wet entrance. Cupping her face gently, he stroked her cheeks. She could taste herself on his mouth when he bent and kissed her.

  *

  “Don’t move, Rowan. Don’t close your eyes. I want to see your face when I’m deep inside you.” She didn’t flinch at his rough demand, which he was thankful for. He could only imagine the pain she’d suffered at her father’s hands and the thought of causing her more pain made him sick, but his Dragon was determined to have his mate.

  He pushed forward, his cock sliding in a few inches before stopping. He was stretching her, and her body fit him like a glove and held him snug. Rowan was wet enough that he was able to slide in and out a bit, but the deeper he tunneled the tighter she became.

  He couldn’t believe how very taut she was. The feeling was intoxicating, driving him on in a frenzy of molten heat.

  Pulling back, he leaned down and kissed her hard on the lips before plunging all the way into her. Her cry made him freeze. He became very still, paralyzed by the realization that sliced through his mindless passion like a razor.

  His beautiful, strong mate was a virgin.

  He didn’t know why it surprised him. After all, she’d spent her life a prisoner of her father’s sick plots. When would she have had the chance to take a lover? So maybe it shouldn’t have surprised him... But it did.

  “Rowan, Luv why didn’t you tell me?” He felt shamed by his rush to be inside her, even as his Dragon roared its approval. He tried to pull out, but she hooked her legs around his.

  “Aidan, please don’t.”

  “Rowan, why didn’t you fuckin’ tell me?”

  “Technically, I’m not a virgin.” She flushed pink and refused to meet his eyes. “I’ve just never had a lover before.” She turned her eyes back to his and he became lost in their honeyed depths.

  “I would have taken more time...”

  She placed a hand upon his chest. “I wanted you as you are. I don’t want you to be careful. I wanted to feel the real you.”

  He bent forward and kissed her gently, savoring the sweet taste of her lips. She t
ightened her legs even more around him, signaling that she was ready. Unable to resist her, he thrust. Slowly this time, filling her with exquisite tenderness. He bent his head and suckled her nipple while his cock drove into her gently, allowing her to adjust to him. When he was fully seated, he brought her face up to his.

  *

  “I am going to bite you again, Rowan. It’s something I will probably do every time we make love. It’s the way of my people. I promise you this time it won’t hurt.” He thrust slowly, a few short strokes before making them longer, deeper.

  The pain in Rowan’s core ebbed and went completely away. In its place was a throbbing need that was only sated when Aidan was deep within her. Her body was a series of live wires ready to explode with his every touch. The mark he’d left on her shoulder was pulsating now, making ready for his mouth.

  He lifted himself up a little and grabbing her hand, he placed it between their bodies.

  “Rowan, I want you to rub your clit while I’m in you. I need to feel you come apart around my cock, baby.”

  She was embarrassed, but she’d masturbated enough in her twenty-nine-and-a-half years to know how to bring herself to orgasm. And the thought of him watching her was crazy hot. She rubbed while he stroked, his thrusts becoming faster and shallower.

  A few quick strokes, and he started pummeling her with his cock. Hard and deep, his speed was unbelievable and her body was spiraling out of control. Liquid heat poured down her thighs, and she didn’t even try to hold back her scream as his mouth came down and he bit into her shoulder again.

  Her legs slid up his body and clenched him tightly around his ass, pulling him deeper. His arms slid underneath her, so that he was as close to her as possible. Chest to chest, hips to hips, cock to pussy. In that moment she felt an uncontrollable urge, before she realized what she was doing her mouth was open and her teeth were sinking into his shoulder.

  *

  Aidan’s roar of triumph filled the room, echoing off the bare walls. Long before he’d expected it, his mate was marking him. In that moment he and Rowan were surrounded in the amethyst light of their combined auras. They truly were one body, one soul. As their shared orgasms ripped through their bodies, their pasts ripped through each other’s minds.

  He felt her pain, humiliation, her disgust with herself. Her death wish, her love for her sisters and her hatred for her father. He absorbed every one of her emotions as they sank into his skin. They melded and became a part of him, just as his were becoming a part of her.

  He watched as her face changed with each new feeling she was experiencing from him. Just as he’d seen her soul, she was seeing his. Every hate-filled moment since Fiona’d been taken. Every minor victory and every major defeat. She witnessed each without flinching.

  He knew of this sharing, every young dragon was instructed in the ways of mating when they reached sexual maturity. This was a joining between mates which only occurred when their emotions needed release, during times of deep love or severe stress. He guessed theirs was the latter. He and Rowan had been alone for so long, sad and empty. Now they were filling each other up. Their souls were trying to drive away their pain. He wasn’t sure that was possible for either of them. He couldn’t imagine them in the real world, beyond their prison walls. At thirty-five, Aidan was set in his ways. He didn’t know how to share his life with a female. But, God, this felt so sweet. Fuckin’ scary as hell, but so very, very sweet.

  He lay there trying to catch his breath, his hand grasping hers and lacing their fingers. He felt raw, naked. He’d shared who he really was with her. All his secrets were now her secrets.

  When his breathing finally calmed, he rose and helped her to the bed. He kissed her on the forehead and went into the bathroom. Returning with another strip from his t-shirt he sat down next to her. He needed to take care of her, an urge he’d never experienced before with a lover.

  “I need you to open your thighs for me.” She complied, but not before he watched her skin pinken. He loved when she became shy. The women he surrounded himself with were never modest in any form, and he’d always liked that about them. But Rowan wasn’t just any woman. She was his munin. His mate. His wife.

  She’d gifted him with her virginity. It was considered a sacred and rare gift among his people. Their sexuality was so open that virgins were a rarity by the time a dragon reached his or her wedding night. Rowan would never know what an honor she’d bestowed on him.

  He wiped the evidence of her innocence on the rag, cleaning her, as was tradition with his people. It fell to him to prepare her meal and bath. He would take care of her this night, give her what she needed, and then he would make love to her again. This time slowly, properly, with the care a woman of her position deserved. How proud his father would be of him at this moment, following the dictates of a society he’d shunned for over fifteen years.

  He left her to dispose the torn t-shirt. As he returned, he heard the outer door’s slot rattle, and the unmistakable sound of a tray being pushed through. He retrieved the food left for them and headed for the bedroom.

  Rowan had pulled the sheet up to her chin. Sitting down in front of her he removed the sheet, letting it pool around her hips.

  “Don’t ever hide your body from me, Rowan. I prefer you naked in bed,” he ended on a chuckle.

  He placed the tray of food between them and they both dug in without a word. He watched her eat with gusto and it made him smile. It was important for her to stay nourished; after what they’d just shared they both needed to be replenished.

  When she pushed her plate away, he took it into the main room, and when he returned he found Rowan fast asleep on her stomach. He lay down next to her and studied her back. The pain she must have experienced over the years swamped him, filling him with a red rage that triggered blinding pain at the base of his skull. He took several long, deep breaths, forcing a calm he didn’t really feel.

  Leaning over he inhaled deeply. Her skin carried his scent now. Lying back, he couldn’t help the joy he was feeling for the first time in many years. He let it wash over him, warming his blood. His chest felt light, as though the weight of the world was suddenly a little easier to bear.

  Aidan still felt the guilt, the anger over his sister. Revenge was still a priority for him. But it was tempered now, because of the woman asleep next to him. She had taken some of his pain into herself, locking it in her heart.

  Closing his eyes he started the deep breathing exercises that would help him to sleep, and for the first time in twenty years, as slumber claimed him, he no longer saw Fiona, tiny and frail being ripped from his grasp as a bullet slammed into his chest. Now he saw Rowan, lying beneath him, her body open for him, taking pleasure in what he offered.

  Chapter Six

  Rowan lay still and silent, eyes closed, and took stock. She ached, but nowhere near as much as she should. In fact, she didn’t ache where she should, either. Yes, her back was a low, nagging pain, but the searing agony she expected was missing. No, the ache that caught her attention was the one deep in her core. The one centered between her thighs.

  An odd feeling of euphoria teased at her, and she slowly opened her eyes. She was lying on her side and there was a massive back in front of her. Aidan. She squinted as she studied the large tattoo that ran the entire expanse of his back. From shoulder to shoulder, nape of his neck to the base of his spine, stretched a Celtic cross, the name Ghallager written in Old English letters above it. One of the arms of the cross bore the name Fiona. Who was Fiona? A tiny charge of jealousy jabbed at her, but she shoved it away. She didn’t have time to ponder as something else caught her eye in the design. Down the middle of the cross was a blue diamond. The familiar symbol made her stomach knot up. She traced the diamond pattern across his skin.

  “Do you like it?” Aidan’s voice was drowsy, his accent even thicker than usual.

  “Who is Fiona?”

  His shoulders stiffened at the question. She continued to run her hand along his back
and they relaxed infinitesimally. She’d noticed that he enjoyed being petted.

  “She was my sister.” His reply was terse, causing her to flinch. She withdrew her hand, but Aidan turned to face her. His arm snaked out to capture her and pull her back into the safety of his embrace.

  “When I was twelve, my baby sister was taken by hunters.”

  “Oh God, Aidan. I’m so sorry.”

  He kissed the top of her hair. “I didn’t save her.”

  ”You were twelve.” She gripped his arm. When they’d shared themselves she’d felt a great sorrow from him; now she understood why.

  “Doesn’t lessen the guilt. Doesn’t erase the memory of my three-year-old sister being jerked by her hair into a van.”

  “It’s a beautiful way to honor her.” She rubbed her hand down his chest. He felt so warm, so alive. He was vitality and passion, manifest in this body.

  “I designed it myself.”

  “Really?” Rowan turned her face up to his. “Because I’ve seen that blue diamond shape before.”

  “Do you know others from my clan?”

  “No, you’re the only Dragon I’ve ever met. My little sister Erin has this same thing on her back.”

  Rowan watched as all the color drained from Aidan’s face. He sat up, dragging her with him, gripping her arms brutally. “What are these lies you’re telling me? It’s impossible for another to have this pattern on their back, unless it’s a tattoo.” He hissed.

  She tried to wriggle out of his grasp. His grip on her arms was painful and she was starting to lose the feeling in them. “They aren’t lies. My parents adopted Erin when she was really young. Father said that it was some kind of birth defect, or birthmark. That her mother consumed the shifter drug Domin while she was pregnant”